Matt W. (a set of people I actually knew)

If you’re wondering whut a handsome white guy looked like in the early 90s, look no further. Dude was a homeboy of ours, but it was apparent pretty early that when it came to getting girls, we weren’t rilly in his class.

He swam – and not just to get away from sharks – so he wuz all ripped and shit. Which makes me wonder – backintheday, girls in hi skool would put up pictures of shirtless dudes with 6-pack abs and bulging pecs and all that in their lockers. Do they still do that shit? Is it a li’l too gauche? A tad obvious? Or totes the norm? Anyhow, before this gets any more gay, let’s just say he was a handsome man – and not just in a Lank Thompson kinda way. He was real deal like Mass Appeal…

He’s not as strikingly handsome now (and you may not even think he was based on this “approximation” here) – but I didn’t draw him out of spite, or nuthin’. Moreso just because I remembered what a stud he was back then. And it’s not like I was ever jealous, or anything. He wasn’t stealing my shine, nawimean? I was too busy hating everything to talk to girls. But I digress…